|Jason w/ his sparkler!|
My clean house is no longer spotless!! I'm so pissed, but I knew it wouldn't last long. Oh well, at least I got to enjoy it for a little bit anyways. The boys didn't make it to midnight, they were exhausted! Now that the holidays are over, I'm going to go on a strict diet of healthy meats and veggies! I've lost a lot of weight that way before and felt better when I ate that way, so I'm going back to it.. I wasn't going to diet during the holidays though, because that's just stupid.
|Luke w/ his sparkler!|
I'm also ready to be out of this bad mood I've been in like, all of December. I've just been on edge and testy I don't know if it is the stress or what but omg I have been one big biatch. I feel bad that I've been that way, but then again, sometimes I don't feel bad because some people deserve my bitchiness. I'm just not the kind of person that puts up w/ crap. I don't give people trust right off the bat, they have to earn it... and once you break that trust... and talk crap or do something sneaky, I'm not going to just get over it and forgive you. "I will forgive ( at some point ) but never forget."
I feel very isolated these days. I used to have so many friends around me all the time, now I have.. none... well I have friends from MSWorld, but they aren't "around" me if you know what I mean. Though I've been isolated socially here... I actually feel better off... it's like I got the bad seeds out of my life and the only thing I can do now is move forward and be a better person. That's been my goal since I've gotten diagnosed is be a better person... and actually make a difference, and I finally feel like I'm making that difference.
One thing about me is, I don't really have a censor... I say what I want to say, when I want to say it... and if you don't like it, TOUGH. I've really been trying to work on that... but it's going to take some time. I just can't stand fake people and friends that do shit behing my back... don't be involved in my life if you are going to be that kind of person, ya know?
I'm just glad that I'm finally getting my life on a track that I'm happy with and I'm moving forward and leaving all of the bullshit behind me. Here is to a New Year and New Start!
Well, Happy New Year everyone!
Jesus Take The Wheel by Carrie Underwood